Believe it or not, we're locking lips way less than we used to. Studies show that passionate make-out sessions have taken a nosedive in recent years, with some research suggesting a 50% drop in kissing frequency among couples since the 1990s. Turns out, between Netflix binges, doomscrolling, and the general chaos of modern life, we're forgetting how to properly suck face—and that's kinda tragic when you think about it.
The Great Kissing Recession
Researchers call this phenomenon "the kissing recession," and it's got social scientists scratching their heads. Back in the day, making out was practically a competitive sport—think drive-in movies, backseat romances, and those dramatic dip kisses from old Hollywood films. Today? We're more likely to be glued to our phones than each other's faces. A recent Kinsey Institute study found that millennials and Gen Z report significantly less kissing than boomers did at their age, with 20% of young couples admitting they sometimes go weeks without a proper smooch session. The reasons range from "too tired" to "just not feeling it," but the underlying theme is clear: we're treating kissing like an optional extra rather than the main event.
Screen Time vs. Swoon Time
our devices are cockblocking romance. The average American spends over 7 hours daily staring at screens, leaving little energy for face-to-face intimacy. Dr. Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist, explains that kissing triggers dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin—the holy trinity of feel-good chemicals. But when we're constantly distracted by notifications, our brains never get the chance to fully engage in the moment. "You can't properly kiss someone while mentally composing your next tweet," Fisher notes. Even when couples do kiss, research shows it's often brief and perfunctory—more like a quick peck than the soul-stirring, knee-weakening make-outs of yesteryear.
The Hygiene Hurdle
Here's an awkward truth: we've gotten weird about germs. Post-pandemic, many people developed what psychologists call "germaphobia lite"—not full-blown OCD, but enough discomfort to make swapping spit seem kinda gross. A 2023 survey found that 38% of singles now consider bad breath a dealbreaker (up from 22% in 2019), while 15% admit to avoiding kissing altogether during flu season. Cosmetic dentist Dr. Mark Wolff sees the consequences daily: "Patients are suddenly asking about 'kiss-proof' lip balms and breath mints that last through date night. There's this new pressure to have Instagram-perfect oral hygiene 24/7."
Relationship Routines Killing the Spark
Long-term couples face a different challenge: the dreaded routine rut. When you've been with someone for years, kissing can start feeling as exciting as brushing your teeth—just another item on the daily checklist. Relationship coach Esther Perel points out that familiarity is the silent killer of passion. "We kiss most passionately when there's novelty and uncertainty," she explains. "But in established relationships, we often replace eroticism with efficiency—quick pecks as we pass each other in the hallway." The solution? According to Perel, it's about creating "deliberate distance" to reignite desire—whether that means separate hobbies, occasional solo trips, or just not texting your partner every mundane thought throughout the day.
The Case for Bringing Back the Make-Out
Before we resign ourselves to a kiss-less future, consider the science-backed benefits you're missing. A solid make-out session burns 2-3 calories per minute (better than sitting on the couch), reduces cortisol levels (bye-bye stress), and gives your facial muscles a workout (natural Botox, anyone?). More importantly, anthropologists believe kissing helps us unconsciously assess compatibility through chemical signals in saliva. No wonder cultures worldwide have some form of kissing—it's literally in our DNA to connect this way. As sex therapist Vanessa Marin puts it: "Skipping kissing is like trying to bake a cake but leaving out the sugar. Technically possible, but why would you?"
So maybe it's time to put down the phone, pop a breath mint if you're paranoid, and rediscover the lost art of locking lips. Your relationship—and your stress levels—will thank you. After all, in a world full of handshakes, fist bumps, and air kisses, nothing says "I'm really into you" like a proper, no-holds-barred make-out session.
