Figuring out how much to give for a wedding gift can feel like walking a tightrope—you don’t want to come off as cheap, but you also don’t want to break the bank. The sweet spot? It depends on your relationship with the couple, your budget, and regional customs. Generally, a safe range is $50-$150 per guest, but let’s break it down so you can nail the perfect amount without stressing.
Relationship Matters: Close Friends vs. Distant Cousins
Your connection to the couple plays a huge role in deciding the gift amount. If you’re a close friend or immediate family member, leaning toward the higher end ($100-$150 or more) is expected—think of it as celebrating their big day with a gesture that matches your bond. For coworkers, distant relatives, or plus-ones, sticking to the $50-$100 range keeps it polite without overdoing it. And if you’re part of the wedding party? You might already be shelling out for attire and travel, so don’t feel pressured to go overboard with the gift.
Location, Location, Location: Regional Expectations
Wedding gift norms vary wildly depending on where the couple ties the knot. In big cities like New York or Los Angeles, guests often give more ($150-$200) because—let’s face it—everything’s pricier there. Meanwhile, in smaller towns or rural areas, $75-$125 is perfectly respectable. If you’re unsure, ask around discreetly or check local wedding forums to avoid a faux pas.
Budget Like a Pro: Giving Without Guilt
Here’s the truth: No one should go into debt over a wedding gift. If money’s tight, focus on what you can comfortably afford. A heartfelt card with a smaller cash gift or a thoughtful handmade present can mean just as much as a hefty check. Many couples appreciate registry items at lower price points, too—team up with friends to buy a bigger-ticket item if you want to contribute more without straining your wallet.
Group Gifting: The Power of Many
Pooling funds with others is a genius way to give a standout gift without shouldering the cost alone. Coworkers often chip in for a collective cash gift or a splurge-worthy registry item. Just make sure everyone’s on the same page about amounts to avoid awkwardness. Pro tip: Assign a point person to collect money and present the gift so the couple knows who to thank.
Cash vs. Registry: Which Wins?
While cash is king (hello, honeymoon fund!), some couples prefer physical gifts from their registry. Check their wedding website for clues—if they’ve listed cash funds or experiences, they’re likely hoping for flexibility. If they’ve curated a traditional registry, stick to those items unless you know them well enough to venture off-list. Either way, include a note explaining your choice to add a personal touch.
Timing Is Everything: When to Give
Traditionally, guests bring gifts to the wedding or send them beforehand, but modern couples often appreciate post-wedding deliveries too (especially if they’re juggling travel). If you’re mailing a check, send it within three months of the wedding to keep it from feeling like an afterthought. For registry items, aim to ship before the big day so the couple can start enjoying their new goodies.
At the end of the day, your presence (and thoughtfulness) matters more than the price tag. Whether you go big or keep it modest, the couple will remember your generosity—not the exact dollar amount. So take a deep breath, pick a number that feels right for you, and enjoy celebrating their love story.
